Now not everyone that you meet through an online dating service is going to be player, or a jerk, or someone who isn’t interested in finding a long term relationship but some of them definitely are. You need to be wary of dating a new person just like you would be if you were meeting someone to date in a more traditional way.
Wyou meet someone in a more traditional way, there will be clues that the other person is hiding something from you or that something is just not right on their end. The person might be married, might be just looking for sex, or might just have his or her own agenda and not really be interested in relationships. There are a lot of reasons that people might use an online dating service even if they are not that interested in a relationship.
It’s important to stress that you are not more likely to end up having a player answer your online dating ad than you are likely to meet one in a bar or somewhere else. Players are everywhere, and if you are not looking for a serious relationship then that might be the perfect partner for you.
But if you are looking for a serious relationship, it would be upsetting to start dating someone and start to develop feelings for that person only to find out that the person is married, emotionally unavailable, or just a jerk that isn’t really worth your time.
Usually, you don’t have to wait to find out if your online date is a player, a jerk, or has some issues. There are always clues in the person’s profile that will let you know what the person is really like. If the profile seems fine then read carefully through the email that he or she sent to you.
When you are reading the other persons words, look closely for phrases that might indicate trouble. Language that seems overly bitter, hostile or mean is a red flag that the person might have anger issues. Giving out too much personal information, like listing the medications they are taking, can also be a red flag.
Let’s look at some of the other red flags that should tell you that you need to be wary of someone when you’re trying online dating.
Even the most sophisticated player will leave clues to their intentions somewhere in their online communication. Some will be very blatant, and some will be subtle and much harder to spot.
Here are some of the most common situations you will find online that should always raise red flags in your mind.
Not everyone who sets off a red flag is going to be someone that is trying to hoodwink you, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.
Here are some red
Too Much Too Fast
“Wow! As soon as I saw your photo I knew you were the one for me! You are fabulous! Are you smart? You sound smart too. I bet our children will be gorgeous and smart. Won’t we make a great family? Let’s meet as soon as possible. I just know you’re the one for me!”
If you receive an email from someone in response to your online profile and the person starts talking about how he or she fell in love with your photo, or knew from the words that you wrote that you two were meant to be, or uses other language that indicates the person has a great depth of feeling for you, this is a red flag.
Using language like that is inappropriate for a first email and indicates that the person might not be completely stable. Delete the email or reply with a simple “Thank you, but I’m not interested.”
BAD LANGUAGE AND GRAMMAR
“ RU usd to dating online? I have never done it much. It seeks pretty kool so far but hu nows? U should rite back soon so we can get to now each other better”
Now everyone makes mistakes, at times, when typing and not everyone majored in English in college, but if you receive an email from someone that is full of curse words and has a lot of glaring grammar mistakes and misused words, that is a red flag.
Regardless of the person,s education level, you don’t want to be with someone who can’t express him or herself without using curse words or using words incorrectly. It says that the person isn’t going to be able to communicate well in a relationship.
Sending emails full of mistakes also says that the person either doesn’t know how to use a spell check or doesn’t care enough to use it. Either way, someone who puts little or no effort into making a good first impression isn’t someone that you would want to date.
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